The School of Saint Monday

The government has compromised over plans to force faith schools to take a 25% quota of non-faith students. It is not clear at this stage whether it was the power of effective lobbying or the power of prayer that has led to a voluntary agreement with the Catholic and Anglican churches.

Nonetheless, those of us who wish to see children educated in an environment infused with the values we hold most dear, can breathe a sigh of relief and give thanks to whichever sacred being we turn to at times of challenge.

So, with great pleasure, I am today announcing the establishment of the School of St Monday. St Monday was canonised during the industrial revolution by the new class of factory pieceworkers who, devout and god-fearing folk that they were, strictly observed this new Saint’s day as a religious holiday. Every week. Oddly, there was always a surge in new followers at around on Sunday nights in public houses up and down the country.

The start-the-week curriculum at the Monday will consist of strict non-attendance, with optional home study modules in daytime television, local cafe visiting, and MySpace.

While I will be prepared to offer a quarter of places to the children of St Friday worshippers, those from St Tuesday, Wednesday or Thursday worshipping backgrounds will not be sympathetic enough to the school’s core faith. Nothing against them. Some of my best friends are midweekish. It’s just that I am sure they will be much happier undertaking education within their own communities.

Comments

[David Pollock]

Dan Fox rightly mocks the faith schools system.

Seriously, though, the Government's U-turn does not return us to the status quo ante - it amounts to yet more concessions to the churches. From now on, religious schools can be planned to be 20% greater than the religious demand so that 25% of places can be offered to those not of the sponsor's belief.

So yet more school places will not be available for conscientiously non-religious parents and children and yet more teaching and support posts will not be available to conscientiously non-religious teachers and other staff.

[Bob]

I suggest the song (hymn?) written and song by Billy Bragg:

http://www.billybragg.co.uk/releases/albums/england_half_english/st_monday.html

ps The government's U-turn is hugely disappointing. I have no problem with schools having a religious ethos but state-funded religious discrimination is unacceptable.